Winners From the First Quarterfinal

Just when I said that the OHNO has proven to be an educational endeavor, the voting of the masses comes in all wrong! I am shocked that the Third Day cover received any votes at all, and not only that, but has the majority in the masses over Faith Hill. This has caused me to do something that I am not used to doing, namely, doubting my own judgment. So I listened again. Still don't like the Third Day cover, so then I turned to the Faith Hill cover, and thought, what is keeping them from voting for her? I realized that although the Faith Hill cover is beautiful, there is nothing there that makes one demand that she move on, and that vacuum, I guess, is what the Third Day cover is taking advantage of. So should one vote on a great version that, in the end, has nothing to write home about, or a car wreck version that everyone has to gather around and see? I am letting Third Day move on; although this is certainly more of Faith losing it rather than Third Day winning it.
The other match, we find Celine and Bing. (Turning to Bing) Bing, it has been a great ride, and there is something about your voice that proclaims Christmas more than any other in the OHNO. Your White Christmas is the best selling Christmas song of all time, and you are such an icon that when, late in life, you decided it was a good idea to sing "Little Drummer Boy" as a duet with David Bowie, we gave you a pass, saying, "If Bing wants to sing with David Bowie a train-wreck of a song on national TV, then he should because he is Bing." However, this is the OHNO, and the song is OHN, and you ran into Celine. Sorry, friend. May you forever find your friend Bob Hope and take the "road to" continued generations listening and enjoying your smooth bass voice. Celine moves on.